When my youngest daughter was about 3 or 4 years old, she nearly wore out our VCR watching Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. She watched it 3-5 times a day, no, really...I'm serious!! While she was at preschool in the mornings I began work on a Technicolor Dreamcoat for her. ♫It was red and yellow and green and brown. And scarlet and black and ocher and peach. And ruby and olive and violet and fawn♫ And she loved it. She stood on the footstool and sang her heart out in her new coat that swirled nicely and she wore it everywhere... So cute.
I have a daughter a approaching teenhood.. She's my youngest. Like all teens, she's stubborn and never listens to me. So when her older sister and I fell madly in love with The Phantom of the Opera, she wouldn't even watch it. That was a couple of years ago. She got a mini dvd player for Christmas and she had rewatched Harry Potter 6 (also a Christmas gift) 400 times. Okay maybe an exaggeration... In any case, we were on our way out the door to go shopping in another town. She knew she couldn't bear another time through HP but time was up. She grabbed the first DVD available: The Phantom of the Opera.
Yesterday was Martin Luther King day. Kids were out of school so we decided that it might be an adventure to make the biggest Phantom of the Opera fan on earth a mask out of plaster of paris. Fortunately, being the responsible parent that I am, I read the instructions first. It warned that it would get hot and possibly cause burns, no using on skin. So I tried it on the back of my hand first. It didn't get THAT hot but in case of a reaction I put Saran Wrap on her face first. An empty pen/tube up her nose and a grocery bag on her head. I tried dipping gauze strips in the plaster and laying it on her Saran Wrap covered face. It wasn't working well. The plaster dried far too quickly and the pen was in my way it was chaos. I had her stick her finger up her nose and mixed new plaster. The gauze made bumps and didn't lay smoothly AND we were laughing hysterically. It sounds unbelievable and I have video and pictures to prove it. In fact I could probably win $10,000 for the whole experience but I don't post pics of my kids online. Psychos and all.
Good news? She's not that into Sweeney Todd!
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Please tell me that Massachusetts isn't a stupid state...
Yes... Yes they are.
SCOTT BROWN WINS MASSACHUSETTS SENATE RACE
(I wonder how many of my readers just went "HUH??")
Yes, people, I still campaign. I guess I should have actually went there.
SCOTT BROWN WINS MASSACHUSETTS SENATE RACE
(I wonder how many of my readers just went "HUH??")
Yes, people, I still campaign. I guess I should have actually went there.
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Google and YouTube..
How did we exist without them. I found my VERY FAVORITE ice skating pair!! I couldn't remember their names so I haven't seen them in FOREVER but I found them tonight. YAY!!!
They were Canadian and so different they were mesmerizing. Good girl/bad boy. She was tiny/he was strong and she trusted him implicitly.
Isabelle Braseur and Lloyd Eisler 2001 Summer Champions on ice. Bad quality recording but they make you hold your breath in fear:
Patricia the Stripper!! Too funny:
They were Canadian and so different they were mesmerizing. Good girl/bad boy. She was tiny/he was strong and she trusted him implicitly.
Isabelle Braseur and Lloyd Eisler 2001 Summer Champions on ice. Bad quality recording but they make you hold your breath in fear:
Patricia the Stripper!! Too funny:
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Ahhh Faux News.. You never fail to make us laugh..
as deep down we scream in FREAKING TERROR!!! History has been peppered with dynamic duos: Lewis and Clark, The Wright Brothers, The Lone Ranger and Tonto, Beavis and Butthead, but the country can breath a sigh of relief. Glenn Beck had found his Tattoo to his Mr. Rourke. His Lenny to his Squiggy. His Bear to his BJ... Yes Fox has the dynamic duo that will bring peace, prosperity, and... Are we being Punk'ed?? Beck and Palin?? Add in O'Reilly and you have THREE out of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse!!!
Calm down, people. I've brought in re-enforcements:
"How sad that Washington and the media will never understand; it's about country. And though it's honorable for countless others to leave their positions for a higher calling and without finishing a term, of course we know by now, for some reason a different standard applies for the decisions I make." --Sarah Palin, July 4, 2009
Now we understand that the "higher calling" is of a spiritual calling at Fox. Glenn Beck testified of it in his journal! *tear*
Calm down, people. I've brought in re-enforcements:
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| Crazy Like a Contributor | ||||
| ||||
"How sad that Washington and the media will never understand; it's about country. And though it's honorable for countless others to leave their positions for a higher calling and without finishing a term, of course we know by now, for some reason a different standard applies for the decisions I make." --Sarah Palin, July 4, 2009
Now we understand that the "higher calling" is of a spiritual calling at Fox. Glenn Beck testified of it in his journal! *tear*
Friday, January 15, 2010
I loved this but I love classical music and highbrow humor!
I love things that require a basic knowledge of culture and refinement or *WHOOSH* the stupid people. They're are lost! Enjoy:
Rant on Pachelbel's Canon in D
Rant on Pachelbel's Canon in D
Stalker Magnet, yup that's me!
Okay.. I whine about The Headache Whose Name I Can't Utter a lot. A LOT! But here's another of my lesser known problems (lesser known only if you don't know me).. I am a FREAK MAGNET! What is it that enchants these freaky ass people, seriously? I mean I'm funny, breathtakingly fascinating, spunky, mildly opinionated, and some would say I was totally hot (not my words but it's been said). But what is with the sustained anger and hatred? The attacks? The weirdness of trying to get more info?? What if I got all Kung Fu Panda and decided to out weird them?? I could do it ya know. I think the latest has made me the most nervous. He informed me that the majority of Utah women are vicious. Now that's just stupid and unrealistic, except maybe in my case. So who stalks a vicious chick?? A complete tard. That's who!
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Mind over matter?
Soooo... The Headache from Hell. Well into it's 9th year consuming my life. I have been to every kind of doctor you can imagine. From the monumental mistake of the sojourn to San Francisco to be tortured on a crazy ass machine made in the '40's. As seen here:
THAT was the beginning of the end for my spine and I'm PRETTY sure my neighbor's wife chose not to give me ALL the info because she wants me dead (keep that in mind if I end up dead). I've had reflexology, a Chinese dude with herbs and pulse readings, acupressure, acupuncture, chiropractors (one that also included acupressure but all the pressure points were in my boobs. Needless to say I didn't go back.) Ummm, lots of MDs, a pain management clinic that temporarily numbed nerves till they discovered the one that causes the pain is IN the spinal column and no reputable doctor will touch that. Faith healers and the weird "hold sugar in the palm of your hand". Every medication spanning the alphabet and color spectrum. Scotch soaked raisins then when THAT failed just the scotch (which actually helped, but drunk isn't good either). Massage relieves it but because my neighbor had to get a REAL job he doesn't do it anymore. Now his wife can go back to trying to kill her family and leave mine out of it. Needless to say, I have zero faith in anything anymore and don't even WANT to hear ideas.
I have a room downstairs that I call the Zen room. It's a sewing room with a futon. It's dark and cold and that is where I hide out when it's really bad. I have a cat named Sasha. We adopted her from a shelter and when we had her spayed, it never really healed right. She doesn't like to be touched or bothered. She spends a lot of time in the Zen room with me. She sleeps at my feet (in fact if my feet are cold she lets me slip them under her). Lately I've noticed that on the really bad days, she'll come up and want to be petted. She'll even curl up around the top of my head to sleep. Last night was a really bad night. She came up and started to "knead" at my chest (okay not as creepy when SHE does it as when the chiro did it.) then she put one paw on my cheek and touched her nose to different places on my head and face. She even follows me. My kids have seen it too. It's weird, but good weird. I lack faith, but call me crazy. My cat's empathic.
(Sasha shortly after being spayed)
THAT was the beginning of the end for my spine and I'm PRETTY sure my neighbor's wife chose not to give me ALL the info because she wants me dead (keep that in mind if I end up dead). I've had reflexology, a Chinese dude with herbs and pulse readings, acupressure, acupuncture, chiropractors (one that also included acupressure but all the pressure points were in my boobs. Needless to say I didn't go back.) Ummm, lots of MDs, a pain management clinic that temporarily numbed nerves till they discovered the one that causes the pain is IN the spinal column and no reputable doctor will touch that. Faith healers and the weird "hold sugar in the palm of your hand". Every medication spanning the alphabet and color spectrum. Scotch soaked raisins then when THAT failed just the scotch (which actually helped, but drunk isn't good either). Massage relieves it but because my neighbor had to get a REAL job he doesn't do it anymore. Now his wife can go back to trying to kill her family and leave mine out of it. Needless to say, I have zero faith in anything anymore and don't even WANT to hear ideas.
I have a room downstairs that I call the Zen room. It's a sewing room with a futon. It's dark and cold and that is where I hide out when it's really bad. I have a cat named Sasha. We adopted her from a shelter and when we had her spayed, it never really healed right. She doesn't like to be touched or bothered. She spends a lot of time in the Zen room with me. She sleeps at my feet (in fact if my feet are cold she lets me slip them under her). Lately I've noticed that on the really bad days, she'll come up and want to be petted. She'll even curl up around the top of my head to sleep. Last night was a really bad night. She came up and started to "knead" at my chest (okay not as creepy when SHE does it as when the chiro did it.) then she put one paw on my cheek and touched her nose to different places on my head and face. She even follows me. My kids have seen it too. It's weird, but good weird. I lack faith, but call me crazy. My cat's empathic.
(Sasha shortly after being spayed)
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Genetics are a freaky freak thing
So my daughter is freakishly good at sewing. Who has a sewing prodigy??? She has a really suckish sewing teacher. We are transferring her out after the quarter ends. Last year, in middle school, she had a good teacher that taught her the basics but the current teacher doesn't seem to recognize that she has a truly gifted student.
My daughter sews to relieve stress. She's such a perfectionist. So this year she made a sweatshirt with the ribbing and a hood and pockets. She put her name on the front and a hood on the back. She's 15! Because the teacher is and evil biotch, the other students have started asking my daughter for help. She constantly whips out pillows and aprons. Even jammies.
The other day we left her asleep because she'd been sick and we came home surprised to see her awake and she brought my husband his favorite winter coat that he'd broken the zipper in. I told him to get a new coat, but my daughter found him a zipper and sewed it in. An industrial strength zipper and coat on my lame little sewing machine. I said "The other zippers are easier aren't they?" She said "I don't know. That's the first zipper I've put in." Isn't that crazy. My husband said that the coat is better than when it was new. She said she was having probs because there was no zipper foot on the machine. I told I have one and she said "NOW you tell me!"
2 years ago I got a serger and promptly discovered it was WAYYY too complicated. I let my neighbor take it to figure it out. (She's a seamstress.) She kept it for a year because that's how long it took her to figure it out. She tried to show me but it came unthreaded and that was it for me. I can't do it and I don't have any patience. It's sat unused and I've been telling my husband that we might as well put it on ebay. My daughter disappeared for awhile the other night and then came out and handed me a perfectly serged square of cloth. We're keeping the serger and I don't have to sew again in my home decorating ventures.
How cool is THAT??
Umm, lil update from the time I posted this. The teacher is giving my daughter a C in this class. It's feeling a bit personal because her projects are being marked lower than other students in the class that haven't done as well AND she's lost points for projects being late. I understand that my child is a procrastinator but she's sharing a sewing machine because one has been out of commission since the beginning of the class. I feel a parent/teacher moment coming on.
My daughter sews to relieve stress. She's such a perfectionist. So this year she made a sweatshirt with the ribbing and a hood and pockets. She put her name on the front and a hood on the back. She's 15! Because the teacher is and evil biotch, the other students have started asking my daughter for help. She constantly whips out pillows and aprons. Even jammies.
The other day we left her asleep because she'd been sick and we came home surprised to see her awake and she brought my husband his favorite winter coat that he'd broken the zipper in. I told him to get a new coat, but my daughter found him a zipper and sewed it in. An industrial strength zipper and coat on my lame little sewing machine. I said "The other zippers are easier aren't they?" She said "I don't know. That's the first zipper I've put in." Isn't that crazy. My husband said that the coat is better than when it was new. She said she was having probs because there was no zipper foot on the machine. I told I have one and she said "NOW you tell me!"
2 years ago I got a serger and promptly discovered it was WAYYY too complicated. I let my neighbor take it to figure it out. (She's a seamstress.) She kept it for a year because that's how long it took her to figure it out. She tried to show me but it came unthreaded and that was it for me. I can't do it and I don't have any patience. It's sat unused and I've been telling my husband that we might as well put it on ebay. My daughter disappeared for awhile the other night and then came out and handed me a perfectly serged square of cloth. We're keeping the serger and I don't have to sew again in my home decorating ventures.
How cool is THAT??
Umm, lil update from the time I posted this. The teacher is giving my daughter a C in this class. It's feeling a bit personal because her projects are being marked lower than other students in the class that haven't done as well AND she's lost points for projects being late. I understand that my child is a procrastinator but she's sharing a sewing machine because one has been out of commission since the beginning of the class. I feel a parent/teacher moment coming on.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
The Lovely Bones
My youngest daughter has discovered that if I mention a book I like to read and she magically produces it shortly after wards it's like giving me a treasure. Actually it IS giving me a treasure. I notice she has the local used bookstore on speed dial and that is how five days ago I mentioned I would like to read the book The Lovely Bones then finished it today. I wasn't going to read it til after the movie (Jan 15) but I found the book interesting and don't have high expectations for the movie. Sounds like I'm not recommending it, but on the contrary. I liked it very much.
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