So my daughters and I stopped at fireworks stand to buy some firecrackers. We had a grand scheme to light them right outside my bedroom window after my husband went to bed. Firecrackers are illegal in Utah these days. I know that they probably blew off a few digits when I was young, but I didn't lose MY thumb when I had a premature explosion. I lost feeling in it for a while, but I was careful to choose the ones with longer fuses if I needed to toss it. This could explain the problems with young people these days. Safety is forced upon them. So we asked for something loud. There's a scale of one to four, four being the loudest and we bought some. He went to bed at 10:30 so we tiptoed outside and set one on the ground, lit it and attempted to run. I lit and jumped up and tried to run sideways fell and rolled a while. The firework was a high pitched screech and it sent the outdoor cats running and we were trying to get inside to act totally innocent. Unfortunately the indoor cats were gathered at the backdoor curious and we had a small tangle. We all were back in place on the couch but laughing hysterically at the whole incident and waited for him to come out. Nothing.. We went back out, this time we wedged it in the gate right next to the window. I lit, we ran, nothing. It was a dud. We tried again and this time it was all perfect. We were all in place although we were still laughing. The man is totally deaf. We went in to ask him what the heck is wrong with him. He heard nothing. So basically our house could be robbed and we could be dragged from the house screaming and my husband would have no freaking clue.
AND the scale should go up to a 10. We could have been arrested. Hauled off to the clink. He wouldn't even know until he read the article in the newspaper about who has been arrested in the past 24 hours.
Total bummer. I have grass stains on my PJs, a bruise on my butt, traumatized cats, and a rash from the grass. But it WAS pretty freaking funny!
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