So when I was around 13 or 14 this girl moved into my hometown. She was different, she had a different name, and she had nothing to do with the fact that I was very unkind to her. My friends and myself were mean and brutal. When I was 15 I decided to go to Upward Bound (not to be confused with Outward Bound, I wasn't an out of control rebellious sort). She was the only person I knew that would be going too. When I told her, naturally she felt like she'd been kicked in the stomach. We became roomies and then BFFs after that. I seriously thought everyone was fortunate enough to have loyal friends that had your back no matter what. I have never NOT had a friend that I couldn't trust with my life so I took it for granted that these people were common. Since my tormenting of my friend of like 26 years, I've been in various situations that has prompted apologies to her for how I treated her all those years ago. Working with youth, especially girls, I am astounded at their cruelty. My oldest daughter is on the receiving end of a situation like this. Now this is pure honesty, I swear. No parental bias. My oldest daughter is of an age that she is getting a lot of attention from boys. Her 3 friends that I refer to as the "8itch Posse" are the kind of girls that are going to have to find a relative to take them to the prom. The leader of the group is a very unpleasant girl and it's obvious to everyone BUT my daughter that this is jealousy. I see it chipping away at my daughter's self-esteem. I think we've reached a point that my daughter has to give up on this. At least for now. It will be very interesting to see what happens with the 3 of them having no target. They will self destruct, I believe. Meanwhile she is making friends with other girls who are happy, positive, and tells her that she's beautiful and she in turn is happy, positive, and thinks that they are beautiful. She's just over a year and a half away from dating and driving. Life will be a whole new experience for her then.
Now I'm off to apologize to my longtime friend for being mean when I first met her for the hundredth time...
4 comments:
300 words. A bite-sized treat. Nice lucid narrative. Lose the caps, please. It's crutch, Friend Monica.
It's anger management Matthew. This is my ANGER MANAGEMENT blog. It won't be a crutch I use... I've advised her to punch the skinny little biotch in the mouth. I'm not writing to entertain, I'm writing to keep myself from doing something stupid.
I still hope she hits her though. I wish I wasn't so protective and I'd show you pictures. You wouldn't believe it.
I think I'm damn presumptious. Saints or bitches you just have to put up with people. Put as much faith in your kids as you do in your faith and you'll be fine. Bear down, Monica
I have faith in my kids because of my faith. My kids are good people in spite of me. I'm not going to claim otherwise. But I AM going to say that if my kids were that mean to other people, I wouldn't feel good about it and I certainly wouldn't allow it in my house. Actually my daughter is just like, "let it go, Mom." I'm saying "are you sure you can't get me a lock of hair??"
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